Tonight when I woke up early in the morning and couldn’t go back to sleep and satan was tormenting with thoughts that I was not loved, I went out to seek the Lord. And as always He gave me comfort. When I have these thoughts of feeling unloved, I read my prophecy that I got in Dec. 96. Each time I read it, I get a much deeper meaning of some portion of the prophecy. Tonight the phrases “I love you, I love you” and “You are mine, You are mine” repeated several times, and the phrases “You have done nothing to offend me” and “There is nothing you will ever do to offend me for I am your Father and I love you”, really spoke to me. I don’t ever remember hearing “I love you” said to me. One time I remember standing by my Father’s chair talking to him and he affirmed me , the only time anyone ever affirmed me! It made me feel so good but once does not ever make you feel secure or loved. Tonight with the repeating of God’s Words to me in his prophecy to me, His very own letter to me, makes me feel affirmed. It made me feel ever so much better because He affirmed that He loves me because whatever I have done and whatever I will do, will not offend Him! What a revelation! I know that I am His Child and that I am forgiven of anything ever and that He still loves me!
Then I saw some pictures of my Chinese granddaughter, Abby, being reared by my son, Billy and his wife, Linda, when she was only one years old and looking so happy. These two people are the best parents in the world; they have showered love on this girl so much that you can tell that she is loved by the expressions on her face and in her eyes. They have accepted her for who she is and allowed her to be who she is. They have adopted another Chinese girl and she is totally different but they have allowed her to be who she is also and accepted her for who she is. That is all anyone wants from anyone and that is what I have always wanted also.
In writing this blog I just realized that God does accept me for who I am. That is such a comforting and wonderful thought! I am loved for who I am, I am His Child and He is my Father!
If you have a problem with believing that anyone loves you, the only way you can ever feel loved is to know God. You too can know God by accepting Him as your savior and confessing your sins.
The Merry Heart
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